Saturday, March 26, 2016

5th Grade Boys vs. Teen Girls

My youngest turned 11 this week. We weren't going to do a party but at the last minute my mommy guilt went into overdrive. I caved. With the move and all, I didn't feel like we had time to devote to a party. There was also the issue with the other two not having parties because of the moving and making friends bit. We decided the birthday boy could invite his best friends to the local trampoline park and then over to our house to hang out after. Winning! I'm falling hard for low key birthdays! 

With this party of 5th grade boys, I made a couple of new parenting discoveries. All of which conclude that entertaining fifth grade boys is vastly easier than entertaining teen girls. First, there is no need for extra frills. Which frees me up to enjoy my book. Two hours at the trampoline park with a good book holding down a table in the snack shack equals done. All I was required to do was make sure drink cups didn't get thrown away. And when I accomplished my mission everybody was happy. When I'm supervising teen girls, they unload their phones and purses and chapstick and water bottles and jackets and jewelry. I'm sure I have to watch the clock so I can inform them when it's snap chat timer. With boys, I get to sneak off to the restroom while I'm "watching" drink cups. With  the girls, I'm responsible for $500 worth of valuables. so I have to potty dance until someone decides to return to the table to check Instagram notifications.

When I'm with the 5th grade boys, I ask them to pose for a group picture and I get Shia LaBeof. I meant a nice picture where everyone smiles at the camera but…everything is open to interpretation. When I ask for a posed pictures for teen girls, I've got to take multiple posed pictures, go through editing approval, and then cycle through everyone else's phones to take a posed pictures.

To the 5th grade boys, nothing is better than the action shot. And if the faces blur..BONUS. They look like zombies. I wouldn't even offer the action shot to teen girls.

A fifth grade boy is so easy to buy a present for. I just have to buy the one thing he has been wanting for months and months. Once he opens his gift he will be entertained until his next gift receiving holiday. The teenaged girl will take the gift, say thank you, put it in the corner of her room, and continue perusing her social media for eternity.

The one thing I learned not to do with 5th grade boys is try to be funny. They don't appreciate the effort. All you get are blank stares in response. Teen girls love the extra energy! They will piggyback on your jokes without hesitation. And even if you aren't that funny, someone has the decency to pretend you are ❤️

Such differences between the two gender and ages, which makes parenting the brood eventful ;) While equally loved children, I'd much rather manage a fifth grade boy party than host a group of teen girls any day. Less expectations equals less stress.


  1. Trampoline park?! That sounds like the best birthday party ever!!

  2. The teenage years may be the death of me! the 8 year old boy in my house is much easier, but so much wilder!