My Hair Is Black

I thought hair horror stories were only urban legends. Unlucky for me I found out otherwise. Hair horror stories are real. They can happen to anyone, even the most neurotic Yelp users.  Consider this a public service announcement. Next PSA... do not trust Yelp! It makes me so very sad to say that too. I love to use Yelp for everything. But I just have to wonder how my former stylist is the number 1 Yelp stylist in this town. I think the numbers may be stacked but I'll get to that.

The whole issue started when we moved. I decided to stop seeing my gal in San Diego. It was just too difficult to drive to San Diego appointments to maintain the blonde highlights. So I turned to Yelp as any social media loving gal would do. I found the number rated stylist and made my appointment. I admit I freaked out a bit before the first appointment and I had my daughter take my place. The second time I skipped the color and let her cut my hair. It wasn't terrible but not what I expected from the "best". I decided to let her color on my third appointment. We decided to go between a medium and light brown. Something close to my natural color. What happens?!? Black hair. Or should I say allegedly black.

Because someone won't admit that the color is black. Technically, it may not be black. But...

Clearly my hair is black. Honestly, do you even see a hint of brown? 

So as I keep going about my daily business which is hanging out with kids all day... I get all kinds of comments on my hair. Surprisingly or not, most aren't positive. I have a pretty tough exterior so I don't take it too personal. In fact, it gets to be amusing at times. I have this one little blue eyed blonde hair kindergartener who hates my hair. She is trying everything in her power to change it. She even enlisted her mommy hair stylist to make it happen.  

When her mom picked her up on Day 2 of the black hair she pulled me aside. 'My daughter says you don't like your hair'. I was caught a little off guard, 'Kind of. But I think it is M who doesn't like my hair'. I tell you people, kindergarteners are smart and ruthless. They will manipulate and recruit the support they need to get what they want. And that little girl wants my hair... any color but BLACK. Anyways, mom the hairstylist, set me on the road to recovery and by using a clarifying shampoo to fade the color quicker. I'm on it.

But now the question is what to do next. Black is completely out of the question. And I really don't want to be blonde again just yet. It seems between blonde and (the middle photo) brown there is a middle ground. I just need to find the one who can make that happen.

Until then, I will be living the life of Lara Croft: Tomb Raider. That is what I feel like. Black is such a peculiar color. Kids hate it. I make babies cry and small children cower as I enter the room. Every day they remind me, "Your hair is still that color".  Yep, still THAT color. Got it! Maybe black hair represents evil to kids, the wicked witch association? Just one time let's make the evil one a blonde, m'kay? Dogs hate it too. I peeked my head over the fence at the neighbors dogs yesterday while they were going crazy. I always do when they need to calm down. Usually the dogs will jump up, tails wagging, and lick my hand. Yesterday I got evil stares and growls. That I took personal! Men react differently. Why wouldn't they? They seem to be a little more intrigued. It's probably the evil witch thing in an inappropriate way. When I get my coffee in the morning, doors get opened, smiles, and occasional double takes. Believe me my brown hair doesn't get the same reaction. I open my own doors and no body bothers to look once let alone twice. Maybe it's not so much who they think I am with my black hair. Maybe they are just trying to get a closer look, wondering why a white girl would do this to her hair?